Yesterday morning, I felt like I didn’t want to eat anything, I just wanted to drink. And I went to tell André that today this is my fast.

André told me, “That’s not fasting 🙂”. In fact, I didn’t want to do it for religious methods of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam. Nor for Buddhism and Hinduism in a spiritual way. Simply, I felt a desire to let flow from what is in my body, and even in my soul.

So, for my body, I thought of juices as a form of vitamins. I started drinking water, then juices with fruits and vegetables and coconut, tea, and even coffee. Everything that wouldn’t weaken my immunity.

But in these judgments about fasting, our juice fast made me try to remember when I did my first fast, which I did in Morocco and London.

That first time I fasted was in Morocco in 2007 during Ramadan. I even went to look up Ramadan, which was from September to October, and how it works according to the lunar calendar.

I can’t forget that; I remember crossing the border from Spain to Morocco. I had traveled through Morocco and crossed to Ceuta, but I wanted to return to Morocco.

I remember Ramadan well there, fasting next to the bus drivers, but not being the tourist who doesn’t respect the culture. Even though they said it wasn’t necessary for me to do it.

But it was right around that time that I had my first epileptic seizure. I was 26 years old, and it was my first epileptic seizure. Of course, this has nothing to do with fasting, because you can eat at night, and at my friend’s house in Marrakech they don’t even observe fasting.

But when I returned to London, where I lived, and went to the hospital for the first time, they wanted to do tests and find out what had happened to my brain. My first mistake, which I managed to avoid because the doctor said I needed it, was throwing the medicine away and not wanting to go back for the test results.

That time, I wanted to learn some Indian methods to help me recover from what happened. I didn’t even know what my attack was, and I didn’t even know it was an epileptic seizure. During that Hindu fast, I spent many days drinking only water and powders, which I don’t even remember what I put in the water.

Well, yesterday I woke up with this craving, and I drank juice that I thought was vitamin-rich. I made juice from carrot, beetroot, apple, and lemon. The second was beetroot, carrot, sweet potato, strawberry, and blueberry. Then two coconut juices, coffee, chamomile tea, and water. I didn’t do this fast for cultural reasons, nor out of fear, it was more to cleanse my body.

Wow, this gave me so much energy, walking around, watering the plants we planted on the street, I even used a hose to water the trees in my yard. I even went for a walk to feed and pet the stray cats.

Still on my vegan diet, I think this fast makes it easier to do. It’s almost like bringing what I eat into juice 🙂

Of course, I took my epilepsy medication and vitamin B12.

But you know, even though it wasn’t a non-religious fast, I felt a desire to free myself, this energy arose, almost without using my cell phone. It was more about being close to nature, which made me more present. I loved how everything flows in our existence.

But at night, I got a headache. But it was right at bedtime. Then I thought, instead of focusing on the pain, I decided to meditate. Seeing that in my mind I was only thinking about what I did in 2007. So in my meditation I observed, focusing on other areas of my body and feeling the watering of the plants, making the juices, I didn’t see any worries. That reminded me of Lobsang, we meditate in any posture of being present.

Later, when I went to write, I started thinking about the past and the future, and what could harm the present. Meditating helped me sleep well.

And today, again, I woke up without an appetite, but I got up and did some stretching, yoga, and meditation, and prepared my breakfast and juice like yesterday. But I already felt in my body and mind that everything was flowing much better.
Yes, I felt that we should observe what the body says, we just need to observe what it tells us. All that was missing was for me to accept what I couldn’t hear.

With love, Jules