This past weekend I celebrated my 44th birthday, right in the middle of nature in the Atlantic Forest area. It’s precisely there that I’ve been living to recover my health and learn the value of all beings on Earth. Everything I learned before, as if it were literature, I’ve come to live and celebrate in this place, defending the environment. This time I attended lectures by the beings we’ve learned about from this land, from our lives.

I heard about defending nature, animals, and how nature could learn from the vegan nutritionist, which reminded me of how veganism helped me understand my illness. We practiced yoga and meditation, and our diet was vegan.

Well, I am the one who recovered from 2 comas and brain injuries, epilepsy, hallucinations, body image issues, vision problems, etc. And as I always said, I balance “diet, meditation, and medicine.” There I saw so many who understand this path of ours and the depth of our lives. Even though I still take medication, and I no longer avoid medicine as I once did.

So I have to tell you about when I came to live in the Atlantic Forest. I’ve known it since I was born, but it was just a vacation spot. But right around the time of COVID, I left São Paulo and went to live in Ubatuba. I was vegetarian, and sometimes I went back to eating meat. But now I’m vegan.

But before 2021 I had already been in my hospital hotel, I had already had permanent diagnoses. Can you imagine, like Multiple Sclerosis, Nervous System problems, Hypoglossal Neuritis, Schizophrenia, Cerebral Vasculitis and even Stroke..

My first epileptic seizure was in 2007, in Marrakech, Morocco. And as my mother observed, I even went to doctors and hospitals to see what it was; that persistent seizure didn’t seem so wrong, but it was unavoidable. But, from the hospital’s point of view, from what I understood, it was their way of trying to understand my brain. But every time they had to change what was.

Even I, avoiding medicine, but also taking medication, ended up in the hospital and my brain being destroyed. In other words, whether taking medication or not, I ended up, jokingly, in my hospital hotel.

Well, in 2021, as I already mentioned, my last brain injury was in 2021. And in fact, the last brain injury was in 2021, and they told me to eat meat since I had low vitamin B12 levels. I also had to take cortisone and rituximab at the Samaritano Hospital. This time it was autoimmune encephalitis.

But once again, I’m not saying anything was wrong with the medicine; it was an attempt to find out. But I would say, I must have had very poor nutrition, with no balance whatsoever, even deficiencies in vitamin D. I lived in Lima, Peru, where I didn’t even see the sun. This second time the pain started in 2016, and my second coma was in 2017

Back in 2021, with this last injury, as I always rejected medicine, I decided to eat meat. This last injury was difficult. I lost my ability to speak, and even to understand what it was, even though my speech therapist was showing it to me. I didn’t remember what it was. And it was even harder to focus.

But this time it gave me cholesterol and I couldn’t speak, I was hallucinating, and it was difficult to focus. This time it was my new diagnosis: “Autoimmune Encephalitis,” which Dr. Rodrigo de Holanda found. And today it makes sense to me; it’s related to what I eat.

In 2022, right there in Ubatuba, I met people who practice meditation, and I decided to go back to being vegetarian. I went to a nutritionist, started eating eggs, cheese, vegetables, etc., and learned to drink coffee an hour after eating so as not to lose iron and calcium, something I didn’t even understand myself, but my husband always had to help me remember.

That month I started meeting friends on these different philosophical paths, and even vegans. That’s when I started being present, and it even helped me to write. Even though I couldn’t write, and it’s still difficult, and reading.

In 2023, I was vegetarian. At the end of the year, I had a blood test, and my cholesterol was high. That’s when my neurologist, Dr. Rodrigo de Holanda, said it was genetic. Well, I decided I would find out more about what it was than what I ate. This October, until 2023, I decided to be vegan, just to prove it’s not genetic.

I came to learn about Ayurveda from my friend Rafaela, who is a psychologist, anthropologist, and lived in India to learn Ayurveda.

It was right there that I started to recover my health. I began to learn that the new diagnosis, autoimmune encephalitis, is about immunity, and I feel it’s closely related to what I eat.

But never in my life, I knew nothing about nutrition. It was there that I discovered what is most inflammatory.

This change in my diet has led me to hear from non-vegans, “Wow, it’s so hard to find vegan food, wow, you’re bothering so many people, wow, why do we have to listen to where there’s protein, wow, you’re going to get sick, etc.” And all we vegans and gluten-free eat are things that have brought me health, but this only works if we learn about our vitamins, calcium, iron, zinc, omega-3. We find so many things in our food, but not vitamin B12.. And I discovered this by having to learn what I eat.

It was right around the time I started learning that the biggest profit there is is medicine and hospitals. As I jokingly say, the hospital is my hotel, and I always realize that about 90 percent of my cases are due to diet. Either it’s a vitamin deficiency, inflammation, or eating all sorts of dietary mistakes.

‘m not saying anything against medicine, I’m just saying we need to learn where it comes from. Perhaps the difficult part is that we don’t learn how our bodies function without food.

But it was during this change that I started to get closer to animals, watching documentaries, and living close to nature. It makes you more present, more than dealing with fashion; it became my fashion, where so many things we use come from causing animals to suffer. But it made me observe my own existence. It makes you observe the timing of everything

I’ve lived in 8 wonderful countries, but I barely noticed how many animals there were, let alone what was lacking in my food. All to respect the culture, but not my own existence or that of other beings.

So, my dears, as I said in the other post when I was in a coma, a woman asked me, “Do you want to live or die?”

Today I would say, “Life never disappears, but I want to acknowledge that all beings on this earth… And never hurt or kill. I want to share with everyone their health, which comes from respecting everything on earth, from seeing its impermanence. It is there that one understands compassion and feels at peace.” This is what made me return to my soul.

This made me feel compassion for the diagnoses that Dr. Getúlio Rabello, Dr. Rodrigo de Holanda, and Euthymia helped me to live again and understand my brain.

And as Dr. Getúlio Rabello used to tell me, “you should write about what you feel to help patients and doctors.” I’m talking about food; it seems that being vegan reduces inflammation in my brain.

But my mind was drawn to these meditation groups, so many focused on Buddhism, Mindfulness, and tantric meditation. This helped me understand our minds. The pain helped me understand meditation; it brings us conscience.

With Love , Jules

My dear friends, I love sharing my lessons, my falls, and I see the beauty of life in beginning to learn.

It mainly started during moments of contradiction in my brain, but I feel it right there in my mind.

Even with the words I already felt at that moment, I sensed the possibility of what I didn’t want to hear. I was born already feeling the injustice of our world, but I didn’t perceive all of this internal struggle; I looked at it from the outside. In a way, an internal loneliness devalued my existence.

Some words from Buddhism made me realize that the basis of my suffering is indeed dissatisfaction and the attachment of my brain and my mind. The pain from there comes anger, jealousy, my ego. In fact, the illness begins to become apparent. It’s the path of trying to diminish it.

Yes, it did take a while to realize I could be happy, to be present. But it started in 2007 when I was 26 years old and had my first epileptic seizure and began losing parts of my brain. This happened when I was in Morocco. From there I started traveling to India and learning about Buddhism.

I had two Comas, one in Thailand and another in Peru, in São Paulo. There I felt a strong loss of areas of my brain. But my last brain lesions were in 2021. But it’s not the pain, it’s the brain, it’s our mind.

In 2021, my last lesion was very hard; losing the ability to speak, write, read, and being lost in my mind. Or rather, I would say, the certainties of the mind don’t forget, but I couldn’t explain it to another person. But along the way, without my own words being very clear, came meditation and veganism, and feeling nature. Sometimes, lost, even touching a tree to understand myself, the earth as Mother Earth, and trying to write and listen to what I write.

And there, even with brain injuries, I felt the silence and the meditations. Today I try to observe the flow of thought and even observe the pain, the breath, the separation, and just observe the impermanence of everything. I learned to always look at any situation in a positive way. And in fact, this helped me recover.

This even made me start to observe if I had other lives, or future lives. But suddenly, as you can see, there our silence is considered selfish because of our silent attack on the minds of all of us.

This fall made me observe the present; almost everything is similar. I even start to see my cats, how the new one is jealous, that psychologically we think we came from my life. But there we see, through recordings, that the cats alone don’t fight in silence when we leave, but when we arrive, the fights and the drama begin, wanting us to see and demonstrate.

So many people consider only human beings to be elevated, enlightened, but I feel that every being has the potential for fear, ego, jealousy, and anger, just like us. I even feel it’s not by chance that my cat Dao appeared by chance; she may be a being who came close to me as a human being who can become enlightened. I even feel that for a human being to feel more elevated, it seems like a form of ego.

Veganism changed me, as did Buddhism and my friends, who seem to be in a spiritual way. We began to deal with compassion for all beings.

My existence has always been about words, but losing words and experiencing errors in my brain made me identify more with acts like cats, because I don’t quite understand what they want to demonstrate.

That made me identify a lot with the film Flow; it identifies the different animals, without words, it made me see the beauty of existence, which isn’t identical to the origins of a being. That reminded me that losing my mind isn’t about the mind.

It makes me think, dear patients, it’s not this loss that signifies negativity, it’s more about where the decolonization of the mind begins.

That’s where we can begin to discover the origin of the pain that comes from relaxation, from dissatisfaction, from impermanence, and discover the ego, jealousy, anger, and we can’t even perceive this impermanence; we just need to see the consciousness of our existence.

There I am trying to lessen these mistakes of mine, trying all the right actions.

It always makes me ponder how, during my first coma, a woman came to me and asked, “Do you want to live or die?”, as if she were Tara, since it happened in a Buddhist country. But a girl asked me what I would say if it happened again during my third coma. I think it’s been two years that I’ve always pondered this. Today I think that our existence never disappears.

We just need to evolve from our mistakes, from our minds, from our souls, it made me see that we are all the same lives, and evolve in our compassion for everything. There it is where it is comin peace.

With love Jules